Hip Hop, Checkouts, Burger King and Teesside....sounds like the first line for a shit joke!

Yo yo, word to ya mutha...yes the rumour you've heard is true. I have been listening to hip hop today.

OK OK, it doesn't count, it's Kanye West and while he is brilliant (though dressed like a tennis player in the above pic), I would be a fool to argue with you haters when you say that I'm only listening to him cos he was recommended to me by the white man-dominated music press of NME and Q, cos its true.

But feck, he's funny and with the remix of 'Diamonds from Sierra Leone' he actually deals with issues worthy of Bono and Bob Geldof when talking about 'conflict diamonds' trade in Africa. So respect to him. Plus I gave myself a small chuckle when Jay-Z says in the same song "I'm not a business man, i'm a business, maaaan".

To tie in with my new hip-hop styles, I bought some 'rapping' paper today for my xmas presents. Hahahaaaaaaa.

I apologise for not posting for awhile but I've been very busy would you believe. Through the past few days I've:

-Been told that I, as a checkout operator, have 'more responsibilty than a butcher' by a superior of mine at work.

-Spent hours thinking what the hell said-manager was talking about when he said that.

-Photocopied

-Gone to Deep Pan Pizza for a buffet lunch with Kes (for all the info, check Richard's site in the links page)

-Had a rather spiffy spontaneous night out with my girlfriend which was a lot of fun. Me? Fun? Hip Hop? Weird.

-Been to Burger King, on my own.

Now the thing with Burger King is that I've had loads of issues with that place in the past. Last year, even though you can hardly tell from my figure, I nearly went regularly every week because it became a sort of addiction.

However, I have since seen the error of my ways and now my only vice is the prostitutes I keep in my wardrobe in home.

In other news, I want to reveal to you all today, that in my 3rd season in charge of 'Teesside' on Pro Evo 5, I have just won the league, the cup and Wefa Championships. Now to people who don't know Evo or those who don't care, please don't taunt my geekyness and for the people who do understand 'I know! How cool!'

OK this hasn't been very funny but this is like rehab. I've had a few days of nothing coming to me for this site, so i'm building up again. Don't give up on me homies.